Passionate Thinking, Passionate Listening, And Passionate Doing

Passionate Thinking, Passionate Listening, And Passionate Doing

In all my seminars the first question that I ask is—how does change happen? By listening or by thinking or by doing? Most of the participants say by doing. Let us make one thing clear—just by taking actions or making efforts we cannot achieve the target. It will be like arocking chair. We will act but we will remain in the same place. If listening and thinking are not involved, then making all kinds of efforts will not
fetch any results. There are many people who think a lot but never take any action.I have met many people in large cities who were aware of happenings of Russian and Chinese economies but were not aware of the basic needs of their own families. How does it help an individual and a country if this discussion has no impact on their decisions? Unless you keep on thinking, listening, and congruently taking actions, nothing will change. For shaping your destiny you have to think, listen, and act congruently. Many people spend years in thinking and do not take any actions. Even in the corporate world many companies waste a lot of time and money on meetings but they fail to translate their efforts into reality. In one of my seminars, a very senior executive came up to me and asked, “Can you get me a job where there will be some work to do rather than just attending meetings?” Such people really want to work rather than waste time in gossiping in the name of meeting. Now the question is, who will decide what is opportunity? My father used to say that every individual gets a chance at least once to show his strengths. An opportunity is a chance unless it is converted into luck by some kind of strategy. It never happens unless we start with massive action. At times we have to eliminate something to achieve and shape our destiny. Just look at this story:

Once upon a time a very famous king told a sculptor that he wanted to see how an idol was made from stone. The sculptor started cutting stone from all sides right in front of the king. After some time the king asked him why was he  destroying  the  stone? “I  had  asked  you  to  construct an idol and not to destroy the entire piece of stone”, he said. The sculptor replied politely, “Sir, I do not make idols. A beautiful idol is hidden inside this piece of stone. I just have to eliminate
the unwanted part of the stone and subsequently the idol will emerge.”This is relevant to our lives also. We also have to weed out our negative 

thoughts to emerge as a better person. Acting without thinking does not
take us to a respectable place. We all know of Michael Jackson, once a millionaire, who died under suspicious circumstances and did not have sufficient money to even support himself during the last days of his life. His health was failing because of his crippling addiction to pain killers and alcohol. Similarly, Mike Tyson, who was once the richest boxer, has no legendary lifestyle now. Many film stars have to resort to substance
abuse just because their thinking and acting has no
congruency. Once I saw on History Channel that John
Belusi had to borrow money from his manager to buy
drugs. He was a very successful person who died at a
very early age because of drugs. I know many people
who take drugs not to enjoy the pleasure, but to avoid
pain and lose consciousness.History is not a slave of any dynasty. History is always  considered a respect for an individual. History is created by winning a battle, be it in the battlefield or in any aspect of life. A great thinker, listener, and
doer always creates history. We all know about the great leaders like Mahatma Gandhi, J. F. Kennedy,Karl Marx, Mother Teresa,
Abraham Lincoln, Maharana Pratap, etc. All these persons created history by performing great
acts. If you ever get a chance to
visit Haldi Ghati in Rajasthan, the
statues of Chetak and Maharana Pratap make it clear that history is not made just by winning the battle, history can also be created by making an honest attempt to win the battle.

MEANING OF LIFE

MEANING OF LIFE

Over the years I have developed a picture of what a human.Being living humanely is like. She is a person who understands, values, and develops her body, finding it
beautiful and useful; a person who is real and is willing to take risks, to be creative, to manifest competence, to change when the situation calls for it, and finds ways to accommodate to what is new and different, keeping that part of old that is
                                    still useful and discarding what is not.

Virginia Satir

He was travelling in his Mercedes Benz fromChandigarh to New Delhi. It was drizzling and there was a light wind blowing. The trees on both sides of the road seemed to be dancing with the wind. Just a day earlier this man had given a seminar for British Council in Taj Hotel, Chandigarh. While the car was moving, he started recalling the event in which everybody shook hands with him, considering themselves lucky and expressed their joy at meeting this man personally, whom they had only seen on television earlier. How can an average person, with a cost accounting degree, having no background in psychology make a successful mark on human psychology? How can he make every participant walk on a burning bed of fire? How can a man, who ten years ago had no money to have food, to buy clothes, who was actually fighting for survival, now help the top companies to survive in tough times? For somebody who 

YOU AND YOUR EMOTIONS

                         YOU AND YOUR 

     EMOTIONS 

           

I think two people don’t fall in love at the same time. One of them stimulates the other at one time and the other one later on. Love is the greatest emotion. Love awakens all sensory acuities—smell, touch, feel, sight, and hearing. Some people keep falling in and out of love. But let me tell you, these kind of people are very much feeling- oriented and true by heart for that moment. Generally, sex becomes the basic instinct but I personally believe sex
is only one of the part of love. I personally do not connect it with religion. When I was studying in class 12, I had read a novel which said, “It is very easy to sacrifice wealth but very difficult to sacrifice an opportunity to have sex with a female.” Yes, I feel it is correct. At that time I felt it was not true, but subsequently I realised that it was 100% true.

The feeling of love is the greatest emotion. In most of the love relationships, all kinds of emotions are found such as lust, fear, distress, delight, envy, rivalry, jealousy, compassion,
anxiety, mourning, grief, depression, fear, and shame.

Once one of my participants expressed his inner feelings. He was married, but he always wished to have sex with somebody else. Once he met a girl and was instantly
attracted to her sexually. He expressed his feelings and the girl also reciprocated. But after some time, the man realised his mistake and decided to break all his ties with that girl. But wasn’t that wrong? The girl was left hurt.
She had a feeling of being used and thrown. In this regard,
I always say what is wrong and what is right is always a
debatable point. It was very difficult to judge who was
correct and who was wrong.

Emotion is a very powerful feeling, it can create depression or ecstasy. It can give power or pain. It depends upon how you reframe the situation. Once I had gone to the northern coal fields to conduct a seminar. On the way, my driver asked me if I was interested to see the king’s palace. At the same time, he gave me a choice that I could see Lal Bahadur Shastri’s parental house instead and the river which he used to cross since he had no money to
pay for the boat. My emotion with the house and with the river was great. Lal Bahadur Shastri was a great reformer and he always provided the greatest positive context to his limitation. When he went to Tashkent after Indo-Pak war, somebody asked him how he would communicate with his tall counterpart from Pakistan.The question was asked because he was short. He replied very politely, “He will bow his head down and I will make my head up.” Therefore, it is clear that events and facts have no meaning. Rather how we perceive and how we develop and connect with our emotions has meaning.

YOU AND YOUR EMOTIONS

YOU AND YOUR
     EMOTIONS

 

Knowing Your Own Self A man’s moral worth is not measured by what his religious

beliefs are but rather by what emotional impulse he has received from nature during his lifetime.

Albert Einstein

Emotion is a state of mind. Emotions make networking of your nerve cells, subsequently it creates a power in you and you become powerful. Sometimes, in case emotions use you, then you become their victim. Use of emotions makes you tension free and it gives a sense of achievement. Even attitude is a product of emotions. We have already discussed the structure of the brain. History says that the person who has used emotions has always gone up to the top whether it is a kingdom or whether it is spiritualism. I had conducted my firewalk seminar for the northern coal fields. While on my way to Singrauli, a small town in India, I visited a famous Buddhist place, Sarnath, the place where Gautama Buddha had delivered his first speech. The emotion that he had for bringing a religion was ultimate.When I visited the museum, The Art of Great Ashoka, I was thrilled to see how Ashoka had used the emotion ofbravery when he was the King of Kalinga. Ashoka would have linked the victory of the Kalinga war to cruelty, but at that moment he changed his emotion and became the most religious person. His creations like stupas and Ashoka chakra are unbelievable. Ashoka had made both his son and daughter the disciples of Gautama Buddha. Now the question is, can we change our emotion? Yes, we 

can. The moment we change the picture of any event, sound from the event, the meaning of the event gets changed. It all depends upon the command that you and I give to your nervous system. We have to condition our brain cells
to accept that. We need to manage emotions in all the spheres of life. Whenever you find that your every business movement is correct, then you become more confident and accurate. It is nothing but the state of emotions. Many people who come to my seminar ask, “Can I enhance my sex drive?”. Ireply in a simple way, “Yes”. If your emotion is stronger and intense, your satisfaction will be higher. It is an incredible gift of emotion. I always say that the key to a healthy sex life is emotional binding. Our emotions get charged with the use of sensory acuity. The internal sound what we create and the internal feeling that we create become the trigger for our emotions.

  

Flow with the Flow

                    Flow with the Flow

Some people start at universal level and come down to a small level. Similarly, some people start at small level and reach a universal level. So, when you are talking to universal level people you should also come on a universal level and in case you are interacting with people who talk at small level then in that situation you too should talk at small level. If you do not talk at the same level, a good rapport cannot be developed. Observation and
flexibility are the key to success. In the west, the same pattern is known as a large chunk thinker and a small chunk thinker. Generally a wife starts with a small chunk and goes to a larger chunk and husband starts with a large chunk and goes to a smaller chunk. This is a normal practice followed by the couples and hence this becomes a barrier in developing a rapport.

  

Opportunity and Compulsion

                                                    Opportunity and Compulsion

While talking to a person, try to understand whether he is looking for an opportunity or it is his compulsion to work. Dhirubhai Ambani had the compulsion to go to Yemen. Then he looked for opportunity in India and that is how Reliance came into existence. The technique for handling opportunity-oriented persons is different as compared to the technique for compulsion-oriented persons.

Yes Pattern and No Pattern

             Yes Pattern and No Pattern

“Yes pattern” people look for same directions, same goals, same ways, and same procedures. “No pattern” people will start with “No’”. Some times
we need this category of people too. Rusi Modi was not a “Yes pattern” person, even then J. R. D. Tata used to love him because his “No pattern” helped Tata corporation to achieve new targets. Once in his interview, Ratan Tata himself had said that Rusi Modi had the guts to go to the crowd and stand right there. Yes, too much of everything is
bad and exactly the same happened with Rusi Modi. He spoke against Ratan Tata and it cost him the chairmanship of the Tata Group. Now it is very clear that “No pattern”
people are not bad but we have to learn to live with them and use their vision for the development of the corporation.